Who am I to Expect That?!....

I expect things out of people. I probably would not have admitted that before today, but it's true none the less. I pretty much believe that I should treat people how I want to be treated and in return they should also treat me as I want to be treated. I expect that if I give to them that they should give back to me as well and that when I take their crap they should willingly take mine too. I also expect that people should do things my way and see things as I do. I expect them to give me the benefit of the doubt, even when I don't do the same for them. And I expect them to care about me and the things I care about, even when its not something that interests them. I expect people to be who I think I need them to be, instead of who they are. And then to top it all off...I get hurt and offended when people don't live up to my standards. But one reaccuring theme that God has been speaking into my life for the past year is that it doesn't matter what other people do or don't do. Every person in this world is responsible for their own actions and attitudes and thus even if people never live up to my expectations, it does not matter....I still need.to treat them with love, joy and respect. That is so much easier to talk about than do. It's hard to swallow your pride and shut off that part of you that says "I deserve better"....but I guess that is what it means to take up your cross. It takes understanding the weight of your own sin and how much your own failures have cost. It takes understanding the depth of your own debt...and realizing how far you have fallen from the expectation's of God. And it takes an understanding of the grace and mercy God has shown to you to do it! Some days I get it....maybe not completely but enough so that I can offer that same grace to others. And then there are other days....where what I want matters most to me in this world and mercy and grace are such foriegn concepts that God has to literally beat me over the head with my own sin before I start to see I am just as much of a sinner in need of grace as everyone else...and thus there is no other option but Jesus. I pray that God helps me to get this more and more every day...that I would have a deeper understanding of my sin so that I can have a greater understanding of His grace. And I pray that I learn that the only expectation Ishould place on people is that they will need grace just as much as me.