Thursday, April 29, 2010

Back in business...

  So last month I was really bad about blogging.  I always have such good intentions...but then again we all know where good intentions lead.  Anyway I guess in part my lack of posting had a direct correlation to my lack of working out.  But this week I've gotten back on track (must be the fact that I am committed to running a half marathon in about a month).  But the one thing I have had to remind myself of over and over again this week is that there is no point of being fustrated that you are not where you want to be...unless you can use it for motivation to get to that place.  So from here on out...it's one step in front of another...step by step back to my dreams!

Jess

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

I am not in control but I know who is..

Hey people,


Okay so this past month has been insane for me. I feel like I have been pulled in a million different directions and in the midst of trying to holding it all together I’ve just been watching things fall more and more apart. The funny thing is the more things fall apart the more I am realizing my desperate need for God.

I’m not usually the type of person who is so forward with my faith. In fact in the last year or so I’ve struggled so much in my relationship with God that although I’ve never once doubted God’s exsistance, I’ve felt like to talk about God as if we were still tight would only make me a hypocrite (so instead I’ve chosen not to say anything at all).

Anyway, in connection to this discovery I’ve also realised that the time I spend working out is about the most amount of personal time I get in my day (beyond the 45 minutes I’ve been getting up early each more to spend reading my bible) and that it’s the perfect oppurtunity for me to spend time talking to God.

In the past I’ve felt like I could only run if I’ve had the right music. This week I switched all my music on my MP3 music over to contemporary christian music and have been using my time out on the road just to talk…and be completely honest… with God. The funny thing is…in bringing all my emotions to God in this way I’ve realised that it’s helped me with my running. When I am feeling overwhelmed and anxious my number one instinct is to run away from the situation…which although I can’t really do, I can act out that feeling by physically running…and so I do.

So my next goal for this next coming month is to continue working on my relationship with God and allowing that healing also help me get back on track with my weight loss goals.

I am not in control, God is…but through Him I can do all things.

Jess

Friday, April 9, 2010

Lesson of the day

Hey Friends!


Sorry that I haven’t posted in a while. I always have such good intentions and then… well… life happens. Anyway today I went for a 4.5 mile run…and while I was out there running that streets it dawned on me once again that I don’t have to fit into any one else’s formula when it comes to running. I have this tendency in life…and thus in running…where I like to do things by the book. I obey the speed limit, I follow all the directions on tests, I don’t jump ahead in line, I wait for the cross walk. So when it comes to running, I like to follow the plan exactly…and when I can’t… well… I get frustrated and quit. That’s what the last two weeks have been about for me.

In the past two weeks (well minus the last three days) I haven’t been doing a lot of running. I realize now it’s cause I can’t seem to find the time (and or energy) to work 8 hours a day 5 days a week, plus deal with all my other responsibilities and still fit in all my scheduled runs. And… well…once I get off schedule…it’s all downhill from there.

But the good thing is… I still LOVE to run. In fact… my car is out of commission for the moment and since I didn’t have a way home from work last night I decided that I would just run home. Turns out it only takes about 35 minutes and other than having to deal with my backpack filled with my work clothes strapped to my back, it was actually quite enjoyable.

So now the plan is…just to run…to let it be fun…to go will how my body is feeling over what some paper tells me I have to do. Granted that doesn’t mean I want to gravitate too much from the “plan” but I guess what I’m finding is that when I do…its okay. So that’s my lesson for the day!

Jess