As a Christian I keep expecting that I am suppose to just know the will of God....not just His desire for the world and all creation, but how I exactly fit into that plan. Yet the more I pray about it, the more discouraged I become because I don't seem to be finding answers beyond "Love God and Love people". People keep asking me things like, is God calling you to this, or is this where you sense God is leading you....and honestly I don't KNOW any of that for sure. All I know is I want to honor God and I don't think it's suppose to be THIS complicated. So why is it?
Over the past two weeks we've been talking about decision making and the will of God at church....pretty much the perfect topic for this moment of time in my life. Yet the conclusions that I seem to be coming to from our sermons leave me feeling both comforted and discomforted all at the same time. It's like a pressure has been lifted off my shoulder while I feel even more lost in this fish bowl of faith!
I don't think God wants me to waste time sitting around while I figure this all out. In fact I think that sort of complacency only pleases the devil....who would like nothing more than for me to sit around to afraid to move until I know everything for sure. So, for now I step forward....trusting God to work through my willingness and protecting me from my own stupidity.