Several months ago I began working a few shifts a week at a local bookstore (same company I worked at before, just a different location). I'm not in charge of anything, I get to pretty much work all over the store and I'm only there a couple of hours a shift. It's great!
Unfortunately, I work with someone whom I am having a really hard time with. I don't think she is a bad person, I just really struggle with her personality, work ethic and how she tends to come across. Normally I can pretty much get along with everyone....even people I don't particularly like....but for some reason with her...I can't seem to do it!
In fact the other day I was quite rude to her over a mess she left for me to deal with. I knew I was being rude....I knew I should have just kept my mouth shut or tried to say something edifying in the moment of annoyance....but I didn't, because quite frankly I wanted her to feel my wrath!
How wrong is that?!?! Here I am....a Christian who is suppose to Love people, not judge them and not treat them as their "sins" deserve...and yet all I want to do (and quite honestly am doing) is make myself out to be better than her and thus cut her down to size!
I was so convicted of this on Sunday as I listened to the sermon at church, that I decided the next time I saw her I would be the bigger person and apologize. And yet...on Monday, when I had more than one chance to do so....I just found myself getting more and more annoyed with her and completely unwilling to say anything!
Why is it so hard to do what's right sometimes? I'm a sinner just like she is and I screw up and rub people the wrong way all the time....so why can't I just see that and find a way to love her?! Anyone else ever struggle with this?!?!